Salty Sweet

Below is the LAST post I wrote while living in Manette, WA
 FOUR YEARS AGO.
(For some reason I never published it)
This week I looked back at my blog for the first time since moving back to Whidbey Island in 2014...  Oh how I miss writing, and the people I met along the way.  Friends,  SO much has happend in the past 4 years, and I'd love to share that with you.  I will do an update post very soon!!
xo  Jodi


******************************
In the Navy

 the term "Salty Dog" is given to an older,

 experienced sailor who has spent much of their career at sea.

Tomorrow our Manette Vintage house is getting all packed up

for our FINAL move.

A move that Jeff and I have been anticipating since we moved away

several years ago.

But its not to the East Coast after all.

We both felt that it was time for us to retire from the Navy

and move home to Whidbey Island, WA.

We are full of excitement, anticipation and happiness...

and for me, a little weird uncertainty.

I was born a military child. I never lived in one home

more than 3 years until I was almost 30 years old.

I married a military man 

and understood that his job and country always came first.

The government told me where and when we would live

my ENTIRE life.

I made friends knowing I'd be moving away.

I get restless after a few years in one place.

I never truly invested in my own career ideas or desires thinking I didn't have time.

Always committed to my husband and my family, but not a place.

**But now? Now WE get to decide everything!** 

And that tastes Sooooo SWEET!

SALTY SWEET

I will keep you updated on our "Salty Sweet Cottage" on Whidbey Island....

but for now.... I have some work to do before the packers arrive!

Finding Serenity as a Military Wife

It’s a warm Summers evening and the sun is setting over the mountains. I look out the back screen door and take a deep breath of the fragrant air. I close my eyes and am taken back to the same smell in the air so many years ago.

It’s a warm evening in August 1996.  I am sitting out on my front steps crying, wishing my children would just fall asleep. The smell of fresh cut grass lingers in the air.  I hear my neighbors laughter from their back yard. The sound of a family playing outside late into the warm Summer night.  I envy them.

It had been another long day of being a Navy wife and mom 24/7. Jeff had been deployed several months of his six-month deployment to the Persian Gulf.  It was his third long deployment in our 8 years together. He had been gone so much before the deployment too, doing work ups and overnight duty section rotations.  I missed him. Our children missed him.  The days seemed eternal and the nights too short.  I was tired and emotional.

In those early days of our Navy career it was easy to feel sorry for myself. Considering all that I had to do alone. Everything fell on me.  Everyone relied on me. Some days were overwhelming. Sick children, broken down cars, not enough money in the bank, and not enough sleep.  As they grew older, I tried to stay on top of homework deadlines, school activities and sports. Trying to meet the emotional and physical needs of three growing kids when my tank was on empty. Some days were easy and some days I wish I could do over. But I couldn’t have done it without the support of some great friends, my faith, and the extended family that would swoop in and save my sanity when I felt like running off to Antarctica…

ALONE.

Military spouses, we do it because we LOVE our husbands/wives and we LOVE our children. We do it because we are grateful for our nation. The responsibilities will either make your marriage stronger or it will tear it apart.  It is never easy, never.  It’s a choice. And with the hardships there is also great reward. Just show up to a homecoming. I wish all marriages could experience that longing. It’s part of the glue that binds military families together.

After almost 26 years as a Navy wife, it is still not easy to be away from the man that I love. In fact, in many ways it’s harder. Our children are grown; our house is empty of the demands. I have more time than ever to nurture myself, my husband and our relationship.  This is our season to get to know our mid-life selves, find new hobbies and go places together.  I long for his presence now, more than ever.  Not because I need help around the house, or could use a break from demands. But because he is my best friend, has been since we were 21. The one who knows me better than anyone else, and yet has so much more to learn. We are getting older, we can’t help that, Lord knows.  It’s evident every day.  We have known many couples in recent years that’ve unexpectedly lost the love of their life. It’s heartbreaking. As much as we want forever, none of us are promised a long life together.

Stick with me here, I’m not trying to depress you all!

I had a “Ahh-ha” moment one day not too long ago as I was driving to Portland for a family event without Jeff. He was out to sea for a few weeks at the time.  I had a brief twang of self-pity on I-5 South (in your most depressing voice…). “Here I am again, all alone, he’s always gone…blah blah blah”.  But as fast as it came over me, it passed and I was brought to tears with the realization that my sweet husband has missed SO much more than I could ever dream of. 

“Stop feeling sorry for yourself!” I demanded.

In his almost 28 year career with the US Navy, he has been away nearly 11 full years.  Add up all the long deployments, work ups, duty days and few years living apart.  11 years!  4015 days give or take a few. 4015 breakfasts, lunches, and dinners. Multiply that by 3 beautiful little children and he missed 12,045 precious hugs around his neck. 4015 bedtime stories and sounds of “goodnight daddy.” He missed his birthdays, kids birthdays, our anniversaries and holidays. Trips to the pumpkin patch, Christmas tree farm and Easter egg hunts. First steps, first foods, first days of school, first dates, first dance, first day of college, cross country trips, family vacations. 

I was there; I was a part of all of those special moments. Yes, I was without my husband, but I was there. I felt those little arms and smelled those sweet necks. I have those moments in my memory. He only has the memories of being told and some photo’s to share in the excitement.

It’s my desire to never feel sorry for myself for being alone as a military wife again. It’s been my privilege to support this man as he served and did his job. His sacrifices have allowed me to be a stay home mom and wife for many years, so that I only worked when I needed to or desired to. He gave when I’m sure his tank was empty.  He supported me when I went through depression and anxiety. Sure, sometimes he disconnected emotionally, because he HAD to, so that it wouldn’t hurt as much to say goodbye to his family.  So that he could focus on the task of serving our Nation. So that he could do his job well.  That could break a lot of men and women, even the toughest nuts. They have to learn to separate their emotions, and say good bye….over and over again.  What a difficult responsibility!

                                     *******

 I close the back door.  I check all the locks. And I crawl into bed alone. As I pull his pillow close to me, I say a prayer of thanksgiving. I am thankful for all that I have been given. The easy and the hard.  The good and the bad.  The strengths and the weaknesses.

I lie in the dark thinking about our past, and our future. How the past 7 months have been a roller coaster ride of decision making.  How the more I try to control what goes on around me, the more I realize each day has an agenda of its own.   All that energy that I put into planning far into the future yesterday doesn’t matter today. It was a waste of precious time. We try to make our plans, but God directs our steps.  Daily. Hourly. Moment by moment.

We planned to go to Hawaii, God redirected our steps.  We planned to go to Washington DC, but God has redirected our steps once again.  I hesitate to share that we are now planning to retire after 28 years. God may decide to redirect our paths once again.  I don’t know for certain what tomorrow will bring.  However, the letter has been sent, and we are waiting to make it official. It’s about as for sure as we can know. 

As we wait, there are two things I am certain about…(1.)That Gods plan is always the one I want to be a part of.  And (2) I don’t want to see my husband miss any more everyday moments in our life together.

Serenity Prayer

God grant me the serenity 
to accept the things I cannot change;

Courage to change the things I can;


and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time; 


Enjoying one moment at a time;

 


Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace; 


Taking, as He did, this sinful world 
as it is, not as I would have it;

Trusting that He will make all things right 
if I surrender to His Will;


That I may be reasonably happy in this life 


and supremely happy with Him Forever in the next.


Amen.

**This is my experience as a Navy wife, I know there are so many moms that have to do it alone every day who don't have the emotional or financial support of a spouse. You are so strong and courageous! Your children will look back and appreciate your sacrifices.  I understand that tiredness and I want to thank you too, for putting one foot in front of the other, pressing on. You are appreciated!

"I had the most interesting call today...."

Gosh!

Where do I start?

I never meant to be gone so long.

Truly.

Remember when I mentioned there would be changes coming?

There was more truth to that than

I even knew.

Have you ever been given a choice and the decision seemed pretty simple?

But deep down you weren't sure if your decision was the best choice?

So you give it to God and ask Him to make the choice for you,

knowing He knows what is best.

As a Navy wife, 

I am pretty used to unexpected change. 

I sense it coming.

 My husband usually comes home with a look on his face

and the words that come out of his mouth go something

like this...

"I had an interesting call today...."

Those words still send a pit to my stomach.

A feeling of anticipation AND uncertainty.

It was just a year ago that he used those words to let me know he would 

be deploying for 6 months last Summer.

In January, 

just one month after his homecoming, 

he was given the choice to change duty stations AGAIN.

Of the options we were given, we happily chose Hawaii!!

Warm breezes, sand between our toes, birds singing all year round.

As we waited for official orders, we stayed quiet about it

(OK, so it was really hard and I told more than I should have,

but it was HAWAII after all, duh!?)

The more I watched HGTV "Hawaii Life",

researched places to live, beaches, planned visits from friends & family...

the more I felt uneasy about being so FAR from my kids for 3 years.

Paradise or not...I tried to block out how sad that made me feel.

Especially with a very real possibility

we could become grandparents during that time.

We waited and waited for the official orders to come in.

We took a 2 week trip to Arkansas.

(I'll share about that soon)

We started to go through everything in our home,

deciding what to take, or not take, all the way to Paradise.

We made many trips to the thrift store & dump.

THEN, about 3 weeks ago, Jeff came home from work,

plopped down his backpack and said...

"I had the most interesting call today...."

I was kneeling on the counter top washing the kitchen windows.

I slumped onto the counter, put down the paper towels and quietly said

"We're NOT going to Hawaii, are we honey"?

***

It turned out that the orders were never written up for Hawaii,

the guy he was supposed to replace was extended and so that option became

obsolete. Without us knowing, the orders were written up for our next choice.

The choice my gut felt was the best choice all along.

The choice that put us within 2 hours of our daughter and husband.

The choice that God knew was for our best all along.

Washington D.C.

The night we found out about the change in plans I called our

daughter, Janelle.

She squealed and cried when I told her.

I felt peace.

*****

Now, that I've had more time to think about it I am kind of scared. 

Sounds silly, I suppose.

I have been in Washington STATE for 23 years.

My husband has lived alone in CA and on ships in order for his 

family to have a sense of stability and structure.

We have lived in 5 houses here,

but our kids grew up with the same friends most of their life.

I wanted that for them, I was a Air Force "brat" and changed schools a lot. 

I envied my husband. He knew the same kids his whole life.

I am not a city girl.

I like wide open spaces.

Water and meadows and space to breathe.

Tall buildings, crowded sidewalks and traffic give me anxiety.

But, I am excited too.

Excited to step out of my comfort zone.

To see and do things I've never done.

A new chapter.

*****

Today we listed our beloved Vintage Home for sale.

I realize that I've been very spoiled.

I don't think the place we will be renting will have crown molding,

hardwood floors, dormers and built ins.

But I'm totally fine with that.

Truly.

I can create a warm and pretty house.

But a HOME...

A home is so much more than the building we live in.

It's a state of mind. An attitude.

All the crown molding, bead board, and hardwood

in the world won't fill your heart the way

memories, hugs and a home cooked meal does.

Home is the sound of laughter, singing, and the warm fuzzy feeling you get when

your husband...children....friends.....family....walk in the door.

And its in the mess they leave behind.

It's the feeling of your puppy curled up at your feet.

It's the smell of hamburgers on the grill on a hot Summer evening.

Home.

xoxo

Jodi

Are you ready to go on an adventure with us?

Celebrating... { Six }

Family Tradition

Great Grandma's Swedish Rye Bread

One of our special family traditions is making Great Grandma Brasks

"Swedish Rye Bread" at Christmas.  This long standing Swedish tradition

is a favorite for us. Jeff makes it every year and we share it

with our family and friends. 

It is delicious toasted with butter on a cold winters day. 

 Our kids have the recipe in their

 Green Family Heirloom Cookbook 

that I made for them as a gift over a year ago.

(psst...kids.... Mom made a typo on this recipe! Change the salt to 1 TABLESPOON, oops)

As the kids were growing up, Jeff and Janelle would often make this bread together.

Janelle now lives with her husband in PA, so she and dad

didn't have that opportunity during the Holidays.

But, since we were visiting, dad decided it would be so fun to make another memory with his sweet girl.

This recipe takes a few hours and I guess I got distracted because

I didn't get any pictures of the finished bread!  

I did find, however, this old picture 

of the bread when they made it together several years ago at our home.

(BEFORE we remodeled our kitchen and I painted the corner cabinets white!)

(Sorry, Janelle, I know you aren't fixed up in this picture, but you are still adorable!
Unlike that awful old kitchen!! ew)

Moms, isn't there something so sweet about watching your husband

cook with your daughter? Heart swelling!

*sigh*

xoxox 

Jodi

Celebrating... { Four }

The making of a Quilt....

Not just any Quilt. 
When Janelle and Justin were married, all the guests gave them

fabric swatches. Pieces of material that had personal meaning. Those pieces

of fabric also represent the gifts of friendship, family and love.

Pieces that will be with them as they create a lifetime of memories together.

Janelle was so excited

 to take those pieces of fabric and create something beautiful and lasting. 

 Justin (and Spieler, their dog) watched her with loving anticipation. 

When she got stuck along the way, 

her husband stepped in and helped her solve the problem.

Each, with their own way of problem solving, worked together to figure it out.

They laid out the pieces of fabric together and created a plan.

She stitched and he ironed out the seams.

Piece by piece, until all those little unmatched swatches,

became the start of a beautiful keepsake.

Life is much like a patchwork quilt.

Little swatches of time, people, and experiences lovingly

laid out together. 

The pieces don't always line up perfectly, 

but once stitched together, 

they are strong enough to endure some wear and tear.

A large, warm memory 

to be wrapped around us and cherished.

Especially during the chilly seasons.

I am looking forward to watching them create this quilt together.

It will be beautiful!

xoxox

Jodi

Celebrating... { Three }

Laughter ....

These are just a few of the moments
we shared on our recent
visit to see our daughter and her husband
 in Pennsylvania.

Aw, I miss them already!

xoxo
Jodi

Celebrating { One }

A love that endures....

Congratulations 

to my husbands parents

 Don and June.

We tried to surprise them with a party, but

a big snow storm blew through the Northwest that week

causing everything to shut down.

Their three sons, and families, made it over to their house safely.

And we celebrated anyways...This was an important day!!

Grilled steaks in the snow taste better than summer!

They smiled as they cut the cake made at the same bakery as the original wedding cake 50 years ago.

Lots of laughter, as always, and lots and lots of love.

Thank you Mom and Dad Green for being such a role model for the rest of us.

For showing us what family is.

For giving us a firm foundation to lean on as our families grow up.

For loving each other and loving us unconditionally.

For 50 years...and counting!

xoxo

Jodi

**I bet you thought I was stuck in another dress somewhere! February was a busy month for us. Come back tomorrow as I continue on with a short series "Celebrating"!

The Lights of Christmas on Camano Island

On Thursday

my just-now-back-at-home-husband and I

decided to fly our

empty nest for the night.

We headed up north to Camano Island to

go to 

The Lights of Christmas at Warm Beach.

Don't let the name of the

beach fool you.

It was certainly not warm or tropical!

But it was very festive and colorful.

We held hands and walked the acres of lights

and scenery.

We loved watching the young children 

with a look of wonder on their face.

As we walked through the candy cane tunnel I

watched a little girl skipping along.

Her face was full of animation and enthusiasm as she yelled out 

to her mom and dad

"HO! HO! HO!....

GUESS (add lisp) who I am?????"....

"I am.... SANTA CLAUS.... (add lisp)

and THIS!!!....

.....THIS!!! IS MY NORTH POLE"

(arms spread out, twirling around)

She summed it up perfectly.

THIS was a Christmas wonderland full of color and joy,

carolers and a 'train' ride around the park.

Hot donuts or wood oven pizza.

Elephant ears and deep fried Oreo cookies.

It was a perfect place for us to spend time alone

snuggled in the cold hand in hand.

We stayed in one of their rooms at the park for the night.

Decorated with garland and lights.

No television or Internet.

Just us.

And when we awoke in the morning and looked outside....

A surprise snow fall!

We really felt we had gone to Santa's North Pole after all.